Reason Not To Have Sex Before Marriage

1. My love for God.

That’s it. My decision not to have sex before marriage has nothing to do with what culture, tradition, society, my parents, or the church expect of me, and everything to do with me loving God and wanting to honor Him with my body and my future marriage.

Ladies, there is no such thing as “We are not having sex because my boyfriend respects me.” If that is his only reason for not having sex with you, then you should not marry him because he will not be fit to be the spiritual leader of your home.

Men, there is no such thing as “We are not having sex because I respect my girlfriend.” Your reason for not wanting to have sex should be the same as hers: Because you want to honor God with your body.

Christian couples, if you love each other, your reason for not having sex until you are married should be because you want to obey and honor God with your body, and because you want your significant other to obey and honor God with his or her body. There is no need to “say no,” because such a question should never be posed in the first place. 

That should be every Christian’s stand. If your relationship with God does not mean enough to you to remain sexually pure, then by all means, go have sex. In fact, you can do more than just have sex; you can do whatever you want with your body, because sexual purity is not just about abstinence before marriage. Sexual purity encompasses every area of sexuality including extramarital sex, pornography, homosexuality, and even how far we allow our thoughts to wander.

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So, if what everybody else thinks takes precedence over what God thinks, or if my fear of consequences is the only thing stopping me from indulging in sexual sin, then why bother to try to keep the rules? If obedience to God is so far down the list after all the other reasons, it only means that my relationship with Christ is not priority in my life, right? And if Christ is not priority in my life, then why should I even bother to call myself a Christian? And if I’m not a Christian, then why should I live the way Christ has called me to live?

Perhaps this is a rather radical stance, but if you think about it, isn’t that the only thing that separates the Christian life from the rest of the world? The only thing that keeps us from letting our sinful nature get the better of us is Christ’s forgiveness through His blood. Yes, His gift of salvation is free, and He will not retract it if we fail to obey Him.

However, the moment we give ourselves to Jesus, we are saying to God, “Yes, Lord. I want to receive your forgiveness, and I want to honor you with my life so that all glory and praise can be given back to you.” Our obedience to Him is a response of love to Him because He first loved us.

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Christian morality without Jesus in the picture is as good as no morality. If Christ is not the center of my life, then it makes sense for me to say that my attempts to keep myself pure for marriage is futile. The results would be unfulfilling and possibly even painful. But with the right motivation, every Christian couple who is on that journey to honor Christ together in their relationship, can look forward with anticipation for their sexual union to be every bit as beautiful as God meant for it to be.

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